Many trans and queer kids only figure out that they are trans or queer far into their adulthood. For them, for us, it often is a matter of recognizing the truth that always lingered in the shadows. Shadows thrown by a lacuna of understanding that there are concepts that can explain our experiences, emotions and desires. Too often our caregivers do not possess the epistemic tools to help us understand. Yet, sometimes they do and still they stay silent when we seek them out. This is, I argue, a hermeneutical injustice (Fricker 2007) and a case of willful hermeneutical silence. Our communication attempts fail not because of ignorance (Pohlhaus, Jr. 2012, Dotson 2011) but because our caregivers choose not to take up our bids for meaning seeking. We are, thus, shunted from speaking on and understanding sex and gender as equals with our endo-cisgender-heterosexual-allosexual-alloromantic peers who can speak freely about these matters and whose words easily find uptake. In the best case this only leads to failed communication attempts with the people who ought to help us understand. In the worst case some of us might suffer hermeneutical death or near death (Medina 2017).